THE CASE concerns the brutal murder of diet-pill heiress Miranda Wright, which you have certainly seen reported in mandatory kino-news-feeds since the discovery of her lifeless body at approximately eighteen hours and thirty-one minutes post meridian, yesterday evening.
After processing information from occu-witnesses and surveillance archives, our Differential Autonomous Verification Engine has determined within an eighty-two percent level of accuracy that the individual with the means, motive, and opportunity to carry out this odious crime was most certainly one of the following:
Cor Prater – Miranda Wright’s lover and live-in fiancé.
A Low Ruffian by birth and nature, Prater has castejumped all the way to Merchant-Management most nepotistically.
Izzy Wright – Miranda Wright’s Father.
A successful industrialist, Izzy Wright has boldly pulled himself up from Merchant-Management to Merchant-Eminence by building a small pharmaceutical company into a multi-industry conglomerate and government advisor.
Anjana Challapattee Wright – Miranda Wright’s Mother.
A legal migrant from the British protectorate Andhra Pradesh, Madame Wright holds no official title in the family’s industrial conglomerate, but is widely known to be a trusted key advisor to her husband.
THESE COURT PROCEEDINGS exemplify the commitment made by the Central Authority of the New Federation of Northern States to a transparent, democratic, effective, and entertaining judicial system.
YOU, THE JURY shall be periodically polled and verdicts rendered as a majority response to judicial queries. Said majority shall be subjectively rendered by court appointed Officiant. Jurors are therefore advised to declare their verdicts with gusto and enthusiasm to ensure that their opinions are democratically registered.